yodathedark: (sad bunny)
I'm not happy with how things went down.

I'm writing this the morning after, on Thursday 22nd July 2010. Not whenever this actually appears on your friends list.

Read more... )
yodathedark: (Default)
You know, I'm reminded of the very first gaming society I joined. They were called the Imperial Order - a Star Wars gaming group that primarily did video gaming. There was an RP element to it and they added a separate RP group not that long after the events of what I'm about to retell.

Now, I was in Shetland, on a half-decent computer for the time, over dial-up. So there was no chance I was going to be doing multiplayer gaming. But I enjoyed the society, the social aspect, the roleplaying of being in character in the chat room, and on the forums. This was the sort of place where everyone knew you by your character name (and you only ever had one character).

I enlisted several of my friends to join this mostly-American society. There were people from all over the world, it was quite successful really - less than some groups, but still one of the more well known groups out there doing this kind of thing.

Now, as it turned out, this society contained some gits. I wanted to see what some of the other groups were like, and so I joined some of them as well - I didn't do much with them, and went back to the IO. I also set up my own side one (with the Rebels) - just a small thing, me and the previously-mentioned mates.

As it turned out, I wasn't the only one in multiple groups. One of the high-ups in the IO was as well, and noticed my email address being used on both IO and EH stuff. I think they also noticed my side Rebel group.

The first I heard of this though, was much later.

There were weekly meetings where reports were given, awards handed out, etc. I was still in school (this was 2001), and the meetings were on a Monday night at 5PM EST, or 10PM GMT to you and me. So I wasn't exactly allowed to go.

I was prepped to become the XO of my squadron, and the squadron leader had sent me a message saying he couldn't make it and could I do the report instead. So I asked, pleaded, begged my mum to let me stay up for the meeting - just this once. She relented, and I stayed up to attend.

The squadron leader was there. I PM'd him and asked him if he still needed me to do the report. He asked me to hang around. I said I had to go, and he said it was important - hinted at promotion, so I stayed.

The important thing I needed to be there for? Being called forward, accused of treason and executed - kicked out of the society.

Just in case you missed that, I was called to a public meeting of the society, in front of everyone, when they knew I couldn't usually make it, and had my character - myself, since we didn't really differentiate - executed for dabbling with other groups.

That night ended with tears.

For some reason, this tale came back to me tonight. I can't think why. Not like it seems to be happening all over again, or anything.

Antagonism

Jun. 14th, 2010 03:37 pm
yodathedark: (evil looks good)
The point has been raised that I have a lot of antagonistic characters. I'm not sure I agree, but I want to do a run down anyway.

ETA: I'll be fair, the comment was "characters with antagonist views".

Laine (Lost)
Laine is stubborn, angry and honest. He doesn't trust most other Lost (they've given him no reason to), and he dislikes a lot of things - seeing them as just making yourself out to be more like Them. This includes Wyrd, Contracts, Entitlements and Courts. And he doesn't like swearing himself to follow others - that's just swearing yourself into slavery. He won't stop anyone else from going against his opinion. And he keeps his opinion to himself for the most part. No one's interested in what he has to say, so why bother saying it?

He joined Summer for several reasons, the most obvious of which was that there was no one else. And he did it for the good of the Freehold because he'd found out about a crisis and he was going to be fucked if he was going to have everything fall apart because of it.

He has deep-seated principles, and there are only a few things that will make him break them. Other characters' opinions aren't one of them. He is steadfastly and obstinately Courtless - and he won't take threats about his choice lying down.

But when it comes down to it, he'll do just about anything for his mates, or for Dunasheen if its needed.

ETA: He also doesn't trust anyone who needs to be under a pledge to keep their word. In Lost society, people who don't keep their word shouldn't be trusted anyway. After all, if they'll break their word so casually, can you guarantee they won't just break a pledge as well?


Nathan (Forsaken)
He's an arrogant, pissed off, headstrong cop who doesn't see why werewolves should get away with mortal law. On the other hand, he's reached a point of "if I don't see it, it didn't happen". He's also arranging cover-ups and finding information.

But he doesn't get on with people outside of Edinburgh, and he has no reason to. That's outside of his territory, outside his city - why the hell should he care? He's signed up for the Hunt and that's the only good reason he's really been given to step outside Edinburgh for the most part.

He's not a social character really. He's blunt, but he's honest, and he won't mess you around.


Charlie Wax (Requiem)
Now, Charlie is an antagonistic motherfucker. He's designed to cause trouble, make people think about what they're prepared to do, and put some viciousness into the game. I made a pledge to myself when I wrote Charlie - that I would never back down from doing something because it was a PC or a friend.

He's supposed to be a monster, he's supposed to be horrific. If he gets killed, he gets killed, but I'm going to see how far I can push things first.


Henderson (Awakening)
Now, Henderson I would never have said was antagonistic. He's a social character, open and friendly, looking to make the world a better place from the ground up.

On the other hand, he seems to have some fairly strong views on things. This has come out more this year as I've been playing through him, and it's caused issue.

Thing is, that's how it's supposed to be for him. He's fueled by passion, and fire burns within him. He's a firestarter, a rabble-rouser. He can make people march on Parliament with a few words - that's the type of character he is. He's an activist, and he knows where he's heading.

But fire goes where it will, and it's hard to control. As we witnessed at the last Anglesey game.


Rocker (Created)
Rocker is an individualist. He doesn't really get other people, and he's not one for making the first move. He really only cares about his music and his friends/Throng.

He's prone to anger and outbursts of rage on occasion, but for the most part he's happy to sit on the sidelines watching.

On the other hand, he's a Promethean. He's strange - go figure.


Spook (Mortals)
Spook was a complete headcase. Bugnuts crazy. And worse if you hit his triggers. I enjoyed Spook, I enjoyed playing Spook - he had a very different take on the world.

I can't say that everyone else felt the same.


You know what? That's my primaries done (well, Laine's not a primary, but...). I'm bored of this now, and I can't be arsed to continue. That's my current primaries though - I've lost a couple that weren't antagonistic at all. At least not until William's buttons were pushed.

I wrote this out, and now, now I'm not sure I want to post it. Because my own stubbornness is kicking in and I don't see why I should have to justify my characters to anyone.

I'm sick of all the bullshit that's happening right now, and I'm half-tempted to say "fuck you all" and leave the society. I won't because in the end, either someone will convince me to stay, or I'll decide that the friendships are worth the bullshit. But I'm sorely tempted.
yodathedark: (sad bunny)

This is something that's been plaguing me for a long time now. And I have to say, I think I've reached the point where I feel comfortable posting it online.


At least, I feel comfortable enough to take the leap and post it. As I type this, I'm not sure what I'm going to do with it. I'm typing it on my Tumblr blog and I plan to post it on my Livejournal as well, but I don't know if it'll be friends-only there or not yet. Depends how I feel when I get there I think.


After all, Tumblr is open to all, so why not post it to everyone on LJ as well? One of the answers to that is of course that only a few people even know about the existence of my Tumblr, so anyone potentially reading it would likely be a stranger, and for some reason that's more comfortable than having lots of my friends definitely reading it.


But I will take the plunge. I'll broadcast this out, via my Twitter to my Buzz as well, though I will remove it from my Facebook. Friends are one thing - family are another. And there are young folk who would see my FB.


Anyhow... to get to the matter at hand... If you don't want to read it, don't feel you have to. I just want to put it out there.Read more... )

Yay...

Mar. 24th, 2010 12:29 pm
yodathedark: (sad bunny)
So far today, I have resisted the urge to curl up into a ball and cry.

And damn I wish I didn't have to.
yodathedark: (Default)
So, a rundown of recent events for those of you not keeping track via Twitter/Facebook/whatever.

late-August: Ruth leaves for Hertfordshire before going to France
3rd Sept: Joey moves in
7th Sept: Me and Ruth have a argument over phone, I break down
8th Sept: I went incommunicado
8th Sept (11:30pm): I give in to Ruth's constant phoning of other people and have another argument with her
11th Sept: I go to Maelstrom, Joey has house party
13th Sept (11pm): I break up with Ruth on way home from Maelstrom
14th Sept (2am): I get home to find out that Joey had a house party and the people he had round walked off with around £1200 worth of stuff including my laptop as well as trashing the place and wrecking my bed and the coffee table - AND JOEY HADN'T NOTICED
15th Sept: I finalised the break up with Ruth
16th Sept: I practically broke down in Cineworld
18th-20th Sept: Southern Regional
24th Sept: I tell Joey the rent is due
25th Sept: I go to Shetland for a week
28th Sept: I go swimming in the sea!
31st Sept: I ask Sam to get Joey to pay rent into bank
1st Oct: It emerges that my benefits haven't come in in anywhere near time, and Joey doesn't have the rent money
2nd Oct: I get back from Shetland
4th Oct: I tell Joey that either he pays the rent and deposit by the 7th or we're evicting him
6th Oct: Joey moves out (leaving a fair amount of clothes and other stuff behind)

So yeh, that's how my life's been.

June 2011

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